Have You SEEN Me?

Wednesday found me dropping my car at the repair shop for new brakes, rotors and an oil change. I have been looking for a good mechanic to care for my 12 year old baby since circumstance put the Saturn station wagon in my life. I walked to the local cafe to sit out the repair work with my knitting bag in tow.

The sun was so bright that I knit in my sunglasses on a bench with a sandwich and lemon water. I was ruminating as I knit, about the cost of the work, the cost of the move, the cost of living in this coastal bliss. I may or may not have been worrying a little about these cost factors as a familiar scene played out in front of me.

A homeless bag lady walked to the back of the cafe and parked her shopping cart of worldly belongings near the busing station. The cafe owner warned her to move the cart within five minutes or she would move it and call the police. I watched the woman defend herself and ask for grace as the cafe owner berated her. She was bundled in many layers of hats and coats with a large cross around her neck. I thought to myself, as I often do when I watch a homeless person, "what if that is Jesus?" I do not know why I always feel like it is a test of kindness to see a person in need and react with due consideration. There but for the grace of God, go I...you know the drill.

So when she walked away from her cart and straight towards me with a beatific smile, I returned her smile and greeted her. She reached toward me with a small bundle of toilet paper and offered it to me. I said " No thank you Mother, I am fine" She insisted and told me to take it and "God Bless You". I returned the salutation, tucked the toilet paper between my knees so I could continue knitting the row where I had paused to speak with her.
one hundred stitches later I shifted my legs and took the little bundle of paper to place in my knitting bag until I could toss it. The paper felt stiff in my fingers and I opened it with slight trepidation. Folded inside was a five dollar bill. I actually gasped. This woman chose me and gave me her blessing.

I waited close to an hour for her to return and claim her cart. I wanted to give her back the money to bless someone again. I wanted to ask her why me? But, the mechanic called me to claim my car. I have that $5 in tissue in a safe place. It has created a story and taken on a life. I wonder how many people have been blessed with some toilet tissue from a homeless woman and tossed it away in disgust? Throwing away blessings never seen. Happy Easter. May you be blessed...