Back to School

My friends, I must admit that I have bitten off more than I can chew. I will work on working out my school work and schedule, and I will be fine. I am old and strong.

I am having some bizarre emotional fallout from what should have been the empty nest. This Fall I should be driving home from delivering my college freshman son to some university within driving distance. Bawling my eyes out on the freeway.

In Fall 2004, we made that drive to Monterey, CA and deposited my daughter at California State University. She was installed with a new computer, books, bedding, dorm essentials, a monthly allowance, and the beginning of a journey that fulfilled so many growth and learning goals. She graduated with her Bachelor in Communications, Specializing in Moral and Ethical Business Practices. She works here in Encinitas for a Dog Daycare affiliated with the local Humane Society and she is pretty happy. She is mostly self sufficient. I occasionally do her laundry-because I like to. I feel like we gave her every opportunity to grow into the woman that she is meant to be.

My son is another story. It breaks mt heart. He is enrolled in the Woodworking program at Palomar, where he would like to be a Luthier. That is what he wanted to do. He has a full load. He has a beater to drive that he actually likes. He lost his job due to the broken elbow that has healed completely. So, he is looking for work. His computer is the same one we purchased for Brynn in 2004. Slow and old by today's standards.No dorm, no allowance, not even books yet. How is it okay to not provide the same for him?


How did this come to pass? Why did one child get every advantage, while the other takes what he can with very little complaints? He will never know the full import of the differences. But, I do. I am sad. I realize that we are blessed beyond measure. I know that I am feeling sorry for myself and my son. He will never know what it is to move into a dorm and meet a group of people that he will know and love for the rest of his life. To get along with a group of strangers as roommates. Formative and valuable lessons in my book. He claims that this does not bother him. I know that it really does. Why is such a fruitless question...

It's "Back to" Time

September is here again. Where does the time go? Another new school year for my youngest son. My daughter's senior year of college. If any of you are involved in school as a student, teacher or volunteer, you feel the energy that results from going back to school.

I love that energy. If you are a member of a church, temple or any institute that is tied into a school year calendar- this month your schedule resumes. I am a community organizer! The community may be the school, church, home, guilds or organizations. New clothes, new supplies, paperwork and plans. I feel called to a renewed sense of purpose. The urge to wear knee socks and fresh penny loafers overwhelms me. How about the smell of new markers! Now, that's a high.

Even year round commitments ramp up as we slip and slide toward the holiday season. Here we go again with fundraisers, preparations for the coming winter, closet cleaning and party planning are full steam ahead. We citizens of the USA are in the midst of a political season that is one of the most interesting and meaningful elections I have lived through. Regardless of your political affiliation, I hope we can agree that our vote has never been more vital. Here is my plug- please vote. Remember, it is done confidentially to protect our rights. As a patriotic person I challenge you to vote with personal conviction and respect the rights of others to do the same.

Knitting gifts require my full time, free time energy.Preparing for the coming winter is my priority. This year of economic challenges, requires me to make more gifts than usual for my extended family and friends. The list gets smaller every year, as a result of maturity, not just financial consideration. We realize that the greatest gift we can give is the gift of time. We cashed in on that this year with the wedding and family reunion. The memories made will sustain us for a long time. Seeing my little boy at 6' 2", standing next to his 4'9" Grandma, is a gift I cherish.

So, get back to your schedules. Do it with a renewed sense of excitement for a new year. Get back to planning and get back to work. Get back to the recreation that balances you. For me, that is knitting. Get back to creating something that gives you that sensation of anticipation. The "back to" feeling that you feel with every new project you start. Next time I'll talk about how good it is to feel the "job well done". Full circle to completion and fulfillment...